Just A Camp Follower...

Almost time...

2007-02-13T21:43:00.001-08:00

In a bit over 24 hours, I'll be on my way to Germany.

Please pray for me. Pray that John's flight is safe and smooth.

Thanks.

LIfe is good...

2007-01-26T23:03:00.000-08:00

Hectic, but good.

I have my passport, and I am slowly coming to believe that I am indeed going to be able to see my darling husband in...well...less than a month! OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG.

Please, God. Please please please please, with a rubber ducky on top?

Geez, I need sleep.

I don't do sick well...

2007-01-22T15:29:00.000-08:00

So I am cranky and out-of-sorts.

I'll be that way for a while.

It's been a while!

2007-01-10T16:55:00.000-08:00

And things are good. Things are wonderful, in fact.

Today, I bought two coats to take to Germany. I was thinking of going with a cute pink trench, but decided that I'd be best off with a nice coat, one that will last for a few years and still look stylish, so I got one that I swear I'm gonna put on the floor and roll around on, probably stark naked. It's just that soft and it's just that gorgeous.

The other is a cute pink coat, a little bit less formal, but they're both heavier than almost anything else I have.

It's getting closer. I'm started to get excited. Now, I need to get in touch with the chaplain, or the FRG. I've gotten some *great* links from a gentleman who is German and it seems that I'll be able to get around pretty well, but I think that I'll be picking up a guidebook and a phrasebook.

I want to be happy...

2006-12-03T13:04:00.000-08:00

for a friend, who's eagerly anticipating her husband's return from Iraq. He's part of the 172nd Stryker Brigade, and he was extended for several months with no warning. I understand that, and I understand that he will be seeing his little girl for the first time in a long time, but I am...

and I am loathe to admit it...

jealous. I'm so tired of being apart. I am so tired of being alone and apart and hoping that the phone doesn't die before I get to tell him I love him. I'm so tired of living chained to a cell phone, hoping that he'll be able to call tonight, hoping that the line won't be long and we won't be trying to stuff a day's worth of conversation into 30 minutes. I am tired of the two second lag in our conversations, I'm just tired of everything.

Don't mind me, I'm just whiney today.

Note to self:

2006-11-18T15:47:00.000-08:00

Dear self,

The world does NOT revolve around you. Just because you can see what could happen doesn't mean that the other person wants it to happen.

Get it? Now, pray to God that your apology is accepted.

Oh, and DON'T open the package!

Thank you, everyone,

2006-11-14T08:25:00.000-08:00

For your kind comments, and for reaching out.

Please forgive my anger and my unkind words.

I don't believe this...

2006-11-13T10:19:00.000-08:00

I make a snarky comment about the "change of power" in Congress, and I get over 60 comments. I make a post about gender roles and I get 60-someodd comments.

I mention three soldiers dying from my husband's unit, and I get ten people commenting or contacting me off LJ.

Oh well, they're just stupid soldiers who are stuck in Iraq, right?

I realize that people have lives, really I do, but when I get my ass chewed of for having the audacity to criticize the "mass mandate" being crowed about in the media, but for some reason the post about three soldiers dying goes unoticed, I get pissed off.

Yes, folx get sick, folx have things to do other than read LJ, unless of course, it's a thread that they can jump in with both feet and whale on someone with the opposite viewpoint.

Shows what I know about what folx think is important.

As always, take this if it applies, and leave it if it doesn't.

So, it's probably not that big a deal to you....

2006-11-03T14:41:00.000-08:00

But I just installed my wireless, natural keyboard and wireless mouse to the laptop. Glory glory glory!

Now I can type a bit easier, though I am going to have to get used to the curved shape again. Have a real mouse is wonderful.

Just to let you know...

2006-11-03T13:25:00.000-08:00

The world is going to end shortly.

How do I know this? It's simply.

I cleaned out my truck. No, seriously. There are still some odds and ends that need to come out, but you can actually see the floorboards in the cargo area and the back seats are clear. I could actually put them down and use the *entire* cargo area if I needed to.

Oh, and I went out to the storage unit and cleaned it up a bit too. Dragged a bunch of boxes, including some stuff left over from my pagan days, to the compactor and pitched it all. Wow.

Granted, now it looks as though my truck and my storage unit has exploded over our living room, but that shall be fixed shortly. Well, maybe not so shortly, but it will be fixed. I'm working on my sewing area right now, trying to sort sewing in to one half and crafts/art supplies in to the other half, so we shall see how well that works.

I finally have a place to hang stuff up in the sewing area though. I took a 1/2" x 24" galv pipe, put a "T" junction on each end, and have lain it atop both bookshelves to span the gap between them and give me a rod of sorts. I really like it, and it's giving me a good place to put costumey bits. My browncoat has taken up residence on the rod, as have some other sewing projects.

I think I might actually go out to the storage unit and pick up the pieces I have for end tables and a "coffee table" bench and get those worked on. I need to get them done, preferably before we move. I also have some for bedside tables, and whipping up the slipcovers for those should be fairly easy. I'll need to get glass cut to go on the top, but that's easy enough, I suppose. After it's cut, I think I'll use some of the etching solution to decorate the tops, as the silk is a plain bronzey color. It's lustrous and stunning, but it's a plain weave.

Geez, I'm tired. Really tired, but I need to keep up my momentum, so I'll be posting this and then waiting on the timer to go off to tell me it's back to work. I'm spending 20 minutes cleaning and then 10 minutes screwing around, so that I don't get burnt out and just pitch it all. I would like the apartment to be all neat and clean again so that I can work on other things.

I can dream, right?

Cracked heels...

2006-11-02T15:24:00.000-08:00

Just piss me off.

Grrr. Off to soak my poor feets and then, give myself a pedicure.

Ah well, at least I'm getting a pedicure out of it. Now, if I could just run on the heel, that would be better.

I just spent....

2006-11-02T13:34:00.000-08:00

Way too much time looking through a list of war dead.

I shouldn't do that.

Halloween wasn't good...

2006-11-02T07:07:00.000-08:00

And I was actually kind of surprised. I went to a Halloween party for a friend of mine in one of my art classes, and it was okay until one of the other folx showed up. She was dressed as Dick Cheney, during the duck hunt fiasco, and while I thought the costume was a bit...silly, I didn't mind it too much...until I realized that she had a toy rifle with caps.

I realize that it was a toy, but still...watching that muzzle zip around the room, with *zero* regard for who was around and where it was pointed. Add in the fact that she had caps in the stupid things, and she was just pulling the trigger randomly. I started to get really edgy and started to get more and more nervous and jumpy and I actually ended up having to leave.

Great. How fun.

I am so tired and melancholy today...

2006-11-01T12:46:00.000-08:00

Although a call from John helped cheer me up. I don't know why, but I'm just...blah. I guess my body didn't think I really understood that I needed rest, because I slept through my alarms this morning, and when I finally opened my eyes, I though...wow, it's bright out at 0600. Yeah, no. It was 1130. YOIKES!

I'm starting to think that more than nine credit hours are more than I can do this time around. It seems like 12 is just a wee bit too much, and I hate it, but I'm just so tired all the time. I feel like a bit of a failure, but that's just me being critical of myself. Part of it is the scheduling, that I know. I can't keep focused during the five-plus hour break between the 2D design class and the History class. It's like I have a brain removal during that time. An hour or an hour and a half is okay, but five hours is waaaaaay too long.

So, I'm going to think about it during work, and see if I want to suck up another W on the transcript, which is better than a D or an F in the class. I have to learn that limitations do not mean "I suck," but rather "There's only so much I can do!"

Ah well, John will still love me, even if I'm only a 3/4 time student. ;-)

Argh!

2006-10-30T21:30:00.000-08:00

Yanno...I wanna go to OCS. This isn't a surprise to anyone, right? Yeah.

However, that means that it's going to be *no* earlier than Sept. 08 before I can get pregnant.

'Scuse me while I go whimper.

Life's been pretty boring lately...

2006-10-28T22:48:00.001-07:00

And I need to get my butt to bed. I am getting up at 0730 to get ready for church and I am going tomorrow. I won't be able to take Communion, because it's been far too long since I had Confession, but at least I will be there.

Oh, how I miss going to church with John. I miss it so badly that it's an ache.

*sigh*

This, too, shall pass.

ARGH!

2006-10-19T18:10:00.000-07:00

Still no word on the grade for the midterm!

Supposedly, the grades are up on WebCT but I'm checking it rather obsessively, and no dice.

I'm so going to scream.

Hmmm. So, I've been bouncing back and forth between this and LJ and I'm not sure if I should keep both up. I'm still not making as many personal posts on LJ, since I just don't feel comfortable, but there's no locking this blog.

Gah. Maybe I should switch to pen and paper?

Except that I've never been able to keep that kind up for more than a few weeks at most. I love the feedback, honestly. I'm enough of an attention whore to admit that, and it helps keep me writing, which is a good thing.

Now, off to burn a CD from one of my shoots.

This is not a good feeling...

2006-10-16T12:34:00.000-07:00

I think I just failed my economics midterm. We'll see, if I did, whether or not the instuctor thinks it's possible to pull a "D" out of the class anyway. If not, I'll have to drop it.

*facepalm*

Excuse me while I go beat my head into the wall.

Remind me...(PROFANITY AND WHINING)

2006-10-13T19:50:00.000-07:00

To never pick up books on OIF, okay? I spent some time at the bookstore today, and ended up thumbing through a few books on the war, and...

That numbing uselessness that I thought had gone away came back. I mean, I looked at pictures from Baghdad, including that fucking blue mosque, and streets that looked so familiar. I remembered sitting on rooftops smoking and joking with the guys I was out on patrol with, and waving at the kids that ran alongside the humvees.

I just feel so useless here. Yeah, so I might be helping a girl on my art class get a job at SG, but so? She'd have found another job without me.

It's Friday night, and since I have drill in the morning, I'm sitting here studying economics, while praying to God I don't fail my test. This semester has been such a struggle for me and I don't know what to do about it. I'm not sure how I'm doing in my beginning drawing class. I mean, there's a reason I'm a fucking PHOTOGRAPHY major, for the love of Bob. It's because...wait for it...I can't FUCKING DRAW! Do we see what the problem is here? I'm taking a drawing class, where I expected to learn something about drawing, and...I'm just confused. What about teaching stuff like perspective? What about teaching stuff like...oh...I dunno, the basics? Gah. I'm sure that she's teaching us that stuff in her own way, but it's still very frustrating.

Crap. I need to bring my homework with me to drill, too, since I won't have much time to study during the day. I've got an appointment with the wedding photographer to make sure that everything's going the way we want it to, and I should get a delivery date on the album tomorrow.

I need to pick up some more PT shorts and t-shirts at the Camp Mabry PX tomorrow, so I hope they have them. If not, I'll have to stop by Ft. Sam's clothing sales on Monday. Next weekend, I'll be in Bismark, N.D. to attend a public affairs conference. Whee.

I still don't understand economics. I really don't, but I'm off to read one more chapter (again) before I go to bed. I'm going to be taking a practice test Sunday, just to see how screwed I am. Wish me luck.

Songs that make me cry...

2006-10-10T13:10:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of them it seems, especially lately.

John posted the lyrics to Johnny Cash's song "Rose of My Heart," and although I'd never heard it, I loved it. So, I dug it up, and listened to it. The recording I have is probably later in life, when age had started to wear Cash's voice a bit, although I doubt it was too long before June Carter Cash passed on.

I was okay for a bit, and then...I just started crying.

I am so in love with this man, and it really does hurt to be apart, but I'll wait for him as long as it takes.

I'll be here when he comes home.

I hate this with a passion...

2006-10-08T08:40:00.000-07:00

One of the side effects of my meds is the fact that I'm not so scattered. That's a good thing, but my brain is now in high gear. That means it never shuts up. Never. I'm constantly in a running conversation with my brain, and that includes having very busy dreams, in which I am terribly frustrated by the amount of things I need to get done and never seem to.

Worse, there are nights when I can't get my mind to be quiet long enough to sleep. I'll lay there with my eyes closed, knowing that I'm trying to sleep, but not being able to. I'll spend hours in these weird states, waking up just as tired as I was when I went to sleep.

Last night, though...

Last night I just couldn't trick my mind into letting me sleep. Sometimes, if I lay very still, and pretend I'm asleep, I'll manage to actually get to sleep. If I tell myself very firmly that I need to sleep, sometimes that works.

Last night?? Nada. Zip. Nothing. Ain't happenin' here.

Ryan called at about 0315 to apologize for his sister calling my cell phone instead of 911 (to report a fight on the side of the highway), and we ended up chatting until he fell asleep on the phone about an hour later. It's a good thing, because he seems to be unable to get much sleep either.

I finally managed to drift off at around 0445.

So, my alarm goes off at 0745. I started to cry.

I suck and I hate this. I am so going to start taking some benadryl to sleep. Or melatonin, or a brick to the head.

Shaking...

2006-10-06T21:30:00.000-07:00

I'm finally back up to the right dosage on my meds. I'd forgotten how much I dislike the side effects. I've started having the really vivid dreams, and right now, I feel like I'm going to fall over. They'll pass, but I'm tired and right now...

*sigh* I don't know why I bother even mentioning how much I miss John any more. It's not like it's any surprise, and it doesn't get better.

I would love to have my husband here, so I can fall over in tears, and realize that he'll still love me, even if my hands shake and I'm dizzy.

'Scuse me while I whine.

I *will* get to church in Austin this weekend. I will.

Tired and cranky...

2006-10-05T20:10:00.000-07:00

And not much of a friend these days. Just too wrapped up in my own stuff to manage to care about others, it seems. I hate that. I hate it hate it hate it.

For that, please forgive me. (Ponsdorf, I'm talkin' to you!)

Right now, this tunnel is still stretching out in front of me forever, and the light that was there has receded until it's a tiny pinprick on the horizon. Right now, I'm doing good to be keeping my head above water and still sucking air.

My economics class is KILLING me. I don't understand it. The art stuff I'm good with. The econ KILLS me. Dead. Dead dead dead dead. Dead. Did I mention it's KILLING me?

I'm looking forward to working on my next design project. It's on tonal range, and it was supposed to be a drawing project, but because it's not a drawing class, we get to use any medium now. Can we say "digital camera" and "Photoshop?" I knew we could.

I'm so lonely. So lonely. I know that I'm not alone, but I want to have someone just reach out and touch me, that someone being John. I want so badly to be able to reach out and touch him, to crack open an eyelid at some Godforsaken hour of the morning (say...0700) and see him standing there with a grin and a cup of coffee, knowing that as long as he's got that magic bean juice he's safe from harm.

I'm so tired of this all. I know, I know. We knew this when we signed on. I get that Doesn't mean I don't get to be pissed off about it. And now, my unit's talking about a two week AT in Germany.

In FREAKIN' MARCH! Hello???? God, can we PLEASE get a break. Please? The money would be nice, but still...

It's not funny anymore. My sense of humor packed up and moved south for the duration. It didn't leave a forwarding address, either.

Ouch.

2006-10-01T20:07:00.000-07:00

Yanno, there's a reason there are six zillion books out there on buying a house, or land or whatever.

It's because it's incredibly confusing and will make your head blow up if you're not careful.

John and I are looking to buy land. Not a ranch, really, more of a ranchito or a rancho not so grande. You know, between five and 10 acres, with some trees and neighbors who aren't right on top of us. Folx who we can see if we want to walk up the drive, turn right or left on the road and walk a bit, but not when we look out the window. A place where we can leave the blinds open all the time, because there's no one else around and we don't have to live as a prisoner to my slight paranoia. A place that doesn't look like all that and a box of Twinkies from the road, maybe, but one that is a bit nicer when you go down the road and around that bend and see the house itself.

Ideally, this is our retirement place, the place that we'll head to when the Army is through abusing us both and we decide that it's time to be bums together. It's the place we'd like to be able to throw the kids out the door with the admonishment "Don't get lost, don't screw with the scorpions and don't drown each other!" and then have them come straggling back in six hours later, hot and sweaty, but having conquered all the Indians in the local area, chased horny toads down little rocky crevices, and been kids in the country.

Ideally, we'd like to be able to live there sooner rather than later. You know, put a nice little modular home on a concrete slab and live there until we're ready to put the dream house on the dream build site.

That's the ideal.

The reality is going to end up a bit differently, I think. A lot of the places we're looking have some pretty good restrictions WRT to modulars/manufactured/mobile homes, and I understand why. I really do. That doesn't mean that I'm not smacking my head against the wall in frustration.

Most of these places are outside of city water and sewer and so, we'd need to do a well, septic system and a driveway along with running electicity to the build site. God alone only knows about internet access and cell phone coverage and all that, but I'm sure that as fast as this part of Texas is growing, it won't be long before they're all available even in the boonies, which is a good thing.

That being said...

I just don't think we can swing a bit of land in a nice place, along with a small custom home. Just don't think we can do it.

We can do a land payment, with no problems at all. That's not a big deal. Once you add in septic, well and the other site improvements...it gets problematical.

Toss in the fact that John wants to do a stint on the drill trail and it gets even more interesting, as we have to plan on finding someone to lease the house. There are some other things, but that would be the biggest problem, and my folx did have some issues when they owned a rental house.

So, now I get to try and communicate all this to John. God. It's not that he's unreasonable or anything, or that I'm scared, it's just hard when there's a second long lag between when I say something and he hears it, or just trying to do all of this while he's so far away.

It's exciting and scary and wonderful, all at the same time.

Wheeeeee!

Hey John!

I love you!

Gah....

2006-09-30T05:26:00.000-07:00

Just feeling very restless this morning, and very antsy, for no reason really. PMS is kicking my butt here, and I'm really anxious. I hate this. I hate being all sorts of squirrelly for no reason except an overactive imagination and bad dreams.

It's not that I want him to NOT tell me...

2006-09-28T20:20:00.000-07:00

But it is hard to laugh and blow off the situation when John relays a bit of fun at the end of a mission. I understand, honestly, how funny it is to look at the stupid Hajis and laugh, since I've done it, but wow.

As a wife, I tend to get a bit queasy.

As a soldier, I get jealous. I still go through fits of "OMG! This is so POINTLESS!!111!!eleventy-one!11!"

Ah well. Work tomorrow.

Been a while...

2006-09-26T20:31:00.000-07:00

Very tired and a bit desolate tonight. Missing John, as usual, and so tired I could cry. Just exhausted and trying to get this art project done.

Gah. Tired and cranky. Need to sleep.

That, and I'm SO TIRED of listening to people bitch about how dumb this country is. How awful and horrible and how we're all just eeebil and stupid and every bad name in the book because we're conservatives.

In the past two days, I've seen rants that basically say any monotheistic religion is a monstronsity and that no matter what anyone says, they're pretty much evil.

I'm so tired of it. So tired of it all.

I guess it's only tolerance when you get to tolerate what you like?

And for a quick bit of linkage before bed...

2006-09-17T22:24:00.000-07:00

Well, it appears the love and tolerance crowd is out and about in London.

The Australians have warned their Muslim population about doing stupid things in the name of being annoyed with the Pontiff.

"We live in a world of terrorism where evil acts are being regularly perpetrated in the name of your faith," Mr Robb said at the Sydney conference.

"And because it is your faith that is being invoked as justification for these evil acts, it is your problem.

"You can't wish it away, or ignore it, just because it has been caused by others.

"Instead, speak up and condemn terrorism, defend your role in the way of life that we all share here in Australia."

Okay, so...when are we going to take a page from Australia's book?

Tired and a little sad tonight...

2006-09-17T19:19:00.000-07:00

Missed the 5k this morning, because yours truly is...blonde. I wrote down the wrong mission.

I am ditzy.

I am also just missing John right now, very badly. Just wish I could have him rub my back and cuddle me and tell me things will be fine.

Not that anything's wrong, just missing my husband.

Going to a hot place in a woven container...

2006-09-14T04:55:00.000-07:00

The LawDog Files: Comments

I think that, despite the fact that I'll get called all sorts of names, I might post this on my LJ.

I love the fact that I can have opinions, as long as they're the "right" ones. Ever notice how folx who scream about the "right" trying to tell the world how to live are just as willing to let everyone know how they think we should live. I guess it's okay to do that as long as you've got the "right" worldview. Or would that be the "left" worldview?

I worry....

2006-09-12T10:13:00.000-07:00

Probably too much.

I worry about John, mostly. How's he holding up? What's he doing for relaxation? How's the conquering of the world coming? Stuff like that.

I worry about the fact that we're still going to be separated after he gets home from Iraq because of OCS and OBC and all that jazz, but at least we'll be in the same time zone and we can actually call each other in the evenings without having to worry about lines and about time limits and the like.

*sigh* That day can come any time now....

He called me today, but sadly I wasn't out of class yet. I don't get out until 1045 my time, or 1945 his time, and he called at 1038 or so. Bummer. He sounded really down, so I'm worried.

I love you, baby. I miss you.

You have a cute butt.

A few thoughts before bed...

2006-09-11T20:36:00.000-07:00

Tonight was a good night. I missed a call from a florist, though, so that was a bummer. I didn't check the machine when I came in, sadly, so evidently, I didn't get my flowers today. Hmmm. Wonder who might send me flowers?

I mentioned on my LJ that I actually took some initiative this weekend, and get a few things accomplished that needed to get done, like tracking down the information for the OCS office and getting the PT test moved to December instead of October so it would be a stronger packet, and I'm actually really proud of myself.

I also emailed the ROTC program at UTSA and asked about doing PT with them. Gah. I'll be getting up at about 0530 three days a week, so I'm going to be exhausted, but I need the extra PT and it's going to be good for my PT test and my weight. God, I'd adore being able to take a PT test and not have to be weighed afterward because I was actually under my allowed weight. It would be a first for me.

I don't know where the cojones are coming from, but I'm likin' this not being scared of my own shadow thing. It's translating to the civilian side, too, since tonight I had a table of Toyota folx, from Japan, and I actually got up the guts to thank them in Japanese. You have to understand- I loathe the idea of being laughed at, but they seemed thrilled that I bowed and tried to thank them in their own language. I'm pretty danged proud of myself!

Last Saturday, I went to Vespers at church, and for the first time, I felt like I belonged, rather than being tolerated because I was John's wife. No, no one has *EVER* been rude, or unfriendly, it's just me. I take a looooooooooong time to feel like I fit in, but I helped tidy up, cleaned up the candle stands, lit the center candle and put out the books and it felt right. It felt like I was doing the right thing and I loved it.

Not sure who this chick is who's taking over my life, but I like her!

BTW...

2006-09-10T20:28:00.000-07:00

I will be attending FenCon, so Tim, I'd love to meet up for lunch at some point.\

:-)

An idea of scale

2006-09-10T18:29:00.000-07:00

Just to give you an idea of how much scaffolding there actually is.

Further left.

2006-09-10T18:28:00.000-07:00

On the left.

2006-09-10T18:27:00.000-07:00

Facing the narthex

2006-09-10T18:26:00.000-07:00

On the right back wall.

Stunning.

2006-09-10T18:25:00.000-07:00

Behind the altar.

2006-09-10T18:22:00.000-07:00

I can't remember what this area is called.

In the altar

2006-09-10T18:20:00.001-07:00

In the altar, to the left of the window.

2006-09-10T18:20:00.000-07:00

On the back wall, up high

2006-09-10T18:18:00.000-07:00

On the back wall, above the balcony.

2006-09-10T18:17:00.000-07:00

Lower and zoomed in a bit.

2006-09-10T18:16:00.000-07:00

For this picture, I'm standing on the scaffolding. The top of the iconostasis is in the lower right hand corner of the picture.

Installing the new icons

2006-09-10T18:12:00.000-07:00

Standing at the left of the iconostasis, looking up. I'm using the Nikon, but the light was starting to go and I don't remember enough about the camera to be able to compensate for it too well.

Expect more of these.

Busy busy busy....

2006-09-07T17:33:00.000-07:00

EDIT: It's assembled! The floor is now glowing, but it's assembled. Go me! I kick ass!

Today was rather busy. Tomorrow will be more so, then I have drill this weekend.

I'm hoping to get to Vespers on Saturday and have Confession. Maybe I can take Communion next week. It's been far far far too long since I've been able to take it. Drat. Nope. I have a 5k to run next weekend with my brother. The weekend after that is FenCon in Dallas.

Anyway, back to today. Had 2D art today, so I need to get my composition finished this weekend. It's due on Tuesday, so I need to get moving on it. The components are done, just need to cut them up and make the "quilt."

After school, I put some books in the mail for PaperbackSwap, went to Jo-Ann's for orange fabric for the Ugly Fabric Quilt, swung by the Cingular store to reduce my minutes, and then...came home to do some sewing.

Got the orange borders on the quilt, and I was going to put Flying Geese all the way around, but...screw that! They'll go on the top and the bottom and that's it. Then, I can batt it, back it and get ready to quilt that puppy. It's due this month, so I'll actually get it done. Go me.

I'm going to keep working on the PTSD quilt. I really only need to make a few more squares and I can get them ready to assemble into a top, and then...maybe I can get it done. Then, I'll start a new one, 'cause I think I'm going to be struggling with this stuff for a while.

Ah well. I'm off to be busy.

QOTD:

2006-09-07T15:45:00.000-07:00

"I'm pretty sure if you velcro a howdah to a hamster you go to the special hell."

Cold hard reality...

2006-09-06T13:07:00.000-07:00

It's funny, but I've managed to almost convince myself that I'm really doing just fine.

You know, I get up, I go to school, I don't scream and I usually make it to work on time. So, for all intents and purposes, I'm doing fine.

See, if you look in the window, it all looks good. The lights are nice and bright, and rugs are straight on the floor, the chairs are all upright and tidy. The books are on the shelves and the pictures hang on wall, neat as a pin.

It's a lie. I know it doesn't look like it, but it's all a lie. That neat tidy room...it's a painted screen. It's all flat and one-dimensional, like the backdrop for a play, but it's all I've got to hang on to. If you step behind that screen, it's a bit of a different story most days.

Oh, don't get me wrong, there are days when it's just peachy in here. There are days when I don't curl up in a ball and sit in the corner wondering why in God's name I'm still here when so many others aren't.

There are days when it doesn't look like some sort of whirling dervish went through here at 900 mph, flinging things this way and that, yanking the pictures down.

There are days when I don't feel like clawing at the walls until my fingers bleed, days when I don't feel like throwing things because it's the only way I can think of to actually get some of the poison out of me.

Those are the days I sew. Those are the days when I pull out the PTSD quilt and I look at it in pieces and try very carefully to sew it all up again. To make the lines straight and the points pretty, to control something in my life, to manage to put something back together from this whole experience.

Some days I just try to keep breathing, telling myself that "This, too, shall pass." It will, I know that, but it can be really hard to explain depression to those who don't actually share a life with it. I saw a commercial today, and it had people wandering around with scales chained to them. Think of it that way, only you're chained to a huge gaping Pit that will suck you in and down and down and down and down until you can't see the top and daylight is only a memory. The air at the bottom of the pit is thick and heavy, so heavy that you feel like you're walking around with a huge heavy blanket over you all the time.

Sometimes, finding a ladder is easier than others. Sometimes that ladder even reaches the top of the Pit. Sometimes, though, climbing the ladder makes you so damned tired you just want the rung to break under you and *whup whup whup whup* you're back where you started.

I hate writing this all down, putting it in black and white (or grey and dark grey as the case may be) because John's already worried about me. He's worried about how I'm holding up and whether or not I'll still be in the same county as my rocker when he gets back. (I'm already off it. Right now, though, I think it's still in sight, but it could be a mirage...)

No, I'm not going to do anything stupid.

I'm fine right now. Part of this is hormonal, part of this was just me being honest on my post-deployment health assessment.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go sew and get ready for work.

Highlights from our conversation last night...

2006-09-06T12:24:00.000-07:00

"No, you can't name the dog Publius Cornelius Whateverus Scipio Africanus!"

"But why not?"

"Because he'll go over to the neighbors' yards and burn the other dog houses down."

"What's the problem?"

*********************************************************************************

"Oh, that's Mr. Atkinson. He's a little weird. Just say 'Hail Caesar!' and give him five bucks when you walk by him and he's happy."

********************************************************************************

"No, you can't have war elephants. You can have war hamsters, though."

"Have you ever seen a howdah on a hamster?"

"Well, yes. But it was a very small howdah."

"....*giggle snort*...*giggle giggle giggle*...you are so weird."

*********************************************************************************

I swear we're the only folx who call each other from theater to have strange convos about Hannibal, burning Carthage, and Ruling the World in Three Easy Steps! (tm) (Actually it was four. Step one- Conquer the world. This step may take some time, so be patient! Step Two- Lather. Step Three- Rinse. Step Four- Repeat.)

If I haven't mentioned it lately, I love my husband.

Glory to God!

2006-09-05T07:13:00.000-07:00

IT'S RAINING!

And not just a few desultory sprinkles either.

In other news...insomnia sucks. I didn't fall asleep until almost 0400 and when my alarm went off, I turned it off and went back to sleep. Not good. At least today was a working day in 2D art and I'm not missing anything major.

snerk

2006-09-04T21:21:00.000-07:00

This is hysterically funny. It's no less funny because it's true.

Note to self:

2006-09-04T20:11:00.000-07:00

Get up. Get your stuff ready for tomorrow. You'll be sorry if you don't and you know it.

The LawDog Files: Ask, and ye shall receive:

2006-09-04T20:10:00.000-07:00

The LawDog Files: Ask, and ye shall receive:

Yes, Virginia, there really is a fried Twinkie. No, Virginia, I've never had one.

Just in case you needed something more to make your arteries hate you...

Isn't that special?

2006-09-04T20:05:00.000-07:00

Wow. You know, I used to find Bill Maher mildly amusing. Now, not so much so.

giggle giggle giggle

2006-09-03T21:58:00.000-07:00

Heh. Feel free to try this proven technique for defending your home and life!

(Meanwhile, I'm gonna be over here grabbing my cutlass or a chair or something to beat the ever living daylights outta some Socially Disadvantaged Critter...)

Wheeeee!

2006-09-03T14:15:00.000-07:00

I've been busy and cleaning quite a bit. Most of it's just de-cluttering, but I've got a bit of trash picked up, too. I've got a bag of clothes I never wear any more to take to the donation box and a bunch of junk mail ready to visit the compactor.

I've also vacuumed the dining room and the living room. I am mighty! (Well, I am until I start thinking about the amount of laundry I need to do and then fold...)

However, I'm making myself get this stuff done before I start playing with the new sewing machine. No, I didn't get the really fancy-schmancy one, but I did get one that will last for several years and will hold me until our tenth anniversary rolls around. :-)

One of the things I find amusing...

2006-09-03T12:21:00.000-07:00

Is the presumption that soldiers are trigger-happy. I see it all the time, most recently on John's blog.

Soldiers, the ones who have to deal with the actual consequences of war and pulling the trigger, aren't the ones who are trigger-happy. Nope, it's the ones who Monday-morning-quarterback the soldiers; those corpulent masses who sneer down their noses at the men and women in the mud, the men and women who weigh the decision to pull the trigger pretty heavily, even though it may not be at that exact moment, those are the ones who are trigger-happy.

If anything, the military wants, when all is said and done and we are committed, to go in and get our job done quickly and with as few casualties as possible. We're prepared, professional and lethal, and it's what we should be. Men or women who pull the trigger to watch people die aren't soldiers or professionals, they're psychotic. There's a difference, but I think it may be lost on some folx.

Here are some quotes that I find interesting. I'll start with the most offensive thing I think I've ever read.

It seems like such a terrible shame that innocent civilians have to get hurt in wars, otherwise combat would be such a wonderfully healthy way to rid the human race of unneeded trash. ~Fred Woodworth

(If you're interested, Fred Woodworth is an anarchist. Recently he's had to undergo some major surgery and bills are piling up. I'm pretty tempted to send him a donation, and make sure that he knows it's from that unneeded trash. If you're so inclined, do the same.)

War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself.
--John Stewart Mill--

War is cruelty. There's no use trying to reform it, the crueler it is the sooner it will be over.
--William Tecumseh Sherman--

Army: A body of men assembled to rectify the mistakes of the diplomats.
--Josephus Daniels--

Diplomats are just as essential in starting a war as soldiers are in finishing it.
--Will Rogers--

Being in the army is like being in the Boy Scouts, except that the Boy Scouts have adult supervision.
--Blake Clark--

Discipline is simply the art of making the soldiers fear their officers more than the enemy.
--Helvetius--

Every man thinks meanly of himself for not having been a soldier.
--Samuel Johnson--

Gates of Vienna: Death Cult Kids

2006-09-02T09:47:00.000-07:00

Gates of Vienna: Death Cult Kids

I haven't gotten a chance to see the video they're talking about, but if the quotes are true...

*sigh* How sad it is that children are being taught their worth is how well they can die for their god.

Peace when Arab mothers love their children, indeed.

I found a bunch of stuff while wandering teh intrawebs....

2006-09-02T09:20:00.000-07:00

You know...sometimes they shouldn't let me out by myself. :-)

The USS Neverdock has some interesting stuff from over a year ago regarding "Islam - Tactics for World War IV". Shortly after that, the USS Neverdock posted some information about those tactics being put into practice.

Today, the Infidel Bloggers Alliance has some info on appeasing Muslims in Britain, and all over the world, and the idiotic steps that are being taken in the name of "tolerance."

I really hate the fact that I'm becoming less and less tolerant, but it seems that I'm becoming less tolerant of a religion that wants to destroy our civilization and for that...I just don't know how to feel. I just don't know how to seperate the "moderate" Muslims, who want to live in the West and at least try to assimilate into our culture, and the ones who would like to see us all living by sharia law and paying taxes to exist in dhimmitude?

On the topic of nukes in the Middle East...why is it that we're spazzing about Iran getting nukes, but seem to be rather blase about the fact that Israel's got enough to turn the world into a self-lighted glass parking lot? Another post from Infidel Bloggers Alliance has an interesting take on it: Nuke Iran? Altas May Shrug.

Well, that's my contribution to the blogosphere today. We'll have to see what happens tomorrow. :-)

Gates of Vienna: Die Dummen Schweden

2006-09-02T08:10:00.000-07:00

Gates of Vienna: Die Dummen Schweden

Oh look! The Swedes have voted themselves out of existence.

Yeah, but at least they won't be offending anyone with their Swedishness anymore.

Day three of the new workout.

2006-08-30T17:02:00.000-07:00

I need to ease up on the abs, just a weeee bit. I'm so sore that I want to stay hunched over.

That being said, I feel great! I feel like I'm going to be getting better and better and better!

This is good.

Annie Get Your Gun!

2006-08-29T20:41:00.000-07:00

The LawDog Files: Women and Guns

I love to shoot. I love the smell of cordite.

What can I say?

They'll convince me that shooting's not womanly as soon as they convince me that I'm a second-class citizen in all ways.

Hey mister, can you spare a dime?

2006-08-29T19:59:00.000-07:00

The LawDog Files: Meditations on Entitlement

I keep some bags full of snacks in the truck and I'm not sure if they actually get eaten or not, but I figure it's a few bucks, and if the person actually needs food, they might get some calories out of them.

That being said, I pretty much refuse to give money to beggars, simply because while I can't stop someone from abusing themselves, I can NOT contribute to it.

Oh. FDR wasn't a total weenie. (Love you, John!)

Note to self:

2006-08-29T11:18:00.000-07:00

Last night? That was good. You actually got through evening prayers and you felt better for it. Remember that feeling, okay? You like to pray, so remember that when you feel like your head is going to explode, and try it. Saying the Jesus Prayer while rolling silver at work isn't a bad thing either. It brings you out of the work mode and relaxes you and reminds you exactly what's important in life, and it ain't the spots on the forks.

Good job this morning!

We know you're not a morning person, but you actually managed to get up after hitting snooze only ONCE. Yeah, maybe getting up at 0600 would be better than 0614, but still, you got up. Make sure you leave the phone on the other side of the room. Getting out of bed to turn off the alarm makes it a bit more likely that you'll stumble into the bathroom instead of back into bed.

Actually remembering to put coffee in your thermos and take it to school with you? Bonus! Good job on that. It helped when you were bleary-eyed in class this morning. Also, even though we think that morning prayers should be done *before* you leave the house, good job on taking your prayer book to class and reading through them before class actually started.

Tomorrow, though, you need to remember to take your meds in the morning.

Also, you managed to get a lunch put together and remembered to bring it to school with you! Yay. Tomorrow, let's try to remember to bring our water, but other than that? You rock.

We're proud of you for remembering your workout clothes too! That gives you one less excuse to get to the gym on campus and work out. Don't forget to wash them this evening when you get home, okay?

Speaking of working out, good job on the workout today. That's two days in a row, and it's a good start. Thank you for making the committment to work out between classes. It's better than running home to mope at the walls, and you feel better. Not to mention, you do have that icky PT test coming up soon, and you really need to pass it.

Well, all in all, you've gotten off to a rockin' start today. Keep it up! We know you can do it.

Mucho love,
Your heart and body and brain.

Note to self:

2006-08-24T21:09:00.000-07:00

Look you,

So you want to scream and scream and scream and not stop until you finally figure out what the hell is going on in your head. Lemme know how that works out for you, okay? Yeah yeah yeah. You had a rough tour, but at least you're still alive, chickie. How many aren't? Quit with the baloney, okay?

You're still lonely. And this is different from the rest of your life how, exactly? You're achingly lonely tonight, with no real desire to pick up the phone and call anyone. Well, the one person you did call was busy, so you let him go. Good! He deserves to have some fun and you don't need to hear from him every day to know that he cares about you, okay?

Gah. You're so emo that you make yourself sick.

Hello? You're a grownup. Get over it.

Do you hear me?

Get.
Over.
It.

Get into school, get into what you need to do. You'll live without friends in SA for a while, at least until John comes home. You don't have time to actually hang out with anyone on a school night and you've got two games going on. Be happy with that, dammit. No, so you don't actually have anyone who invites you over to watch a movie or to hang out after game. Deal with it, okay?

You've got friends in Austin, if you need them, and you know it. Maybe you should try getting your neurotic ass to bed at a decent hour Saturday night so you'd feel like going to church in Austin? Maybe you should actually get to Vespers on a Saturday so you can do confession and then take Communion. You know this shit, Jen! Why are you ignoring it? You're not an ostrich, and pretending to be one just makes your ass stick up, so knock it off.

Now, get off the freakin' computer and get to bed. You've got a killer schedule this semester and you're not going to make decent grades if you're sick.

Lots of frustrated (tough) love,
Me

Hrm...

2006-08-24T12:01:00.000-07:00

John has an interesting post up on his blog. While he thinks it's long and pompous, and something that should be ignored, I think it's pretty fascinating.

We talk about faith a lot. We talk about how it affects our marriage, how it affects our home, how it affects our life decisions and how it affects us individually, and I think his take on why we do so is pretty darned good.

Go check it out for yourself.

sigh

2006-08-23T14:32:00.000-07:00

Too good to be true, I guess.

Gah.

Okay okay okay...

2006-08-20T10:57:00.000-07:00

...so a bit more on the last mysterious post.

Anyone know a good, flexible realtor in the Austin/Ft. Hood area? We're not ready to buy now, but I want to start the preliminary stuff now, figuring out what we can really afford, what we can expect with our credit ratings (John's is great, mine is middling but better than it used to be!) and what the actual steps are.

We won't be ready to buy until April, but I think it might take that long to really know what we're getting into and not throw up in the parking lot on the way to sign the papers.

Right now, we're looking to stay near Ft. Hood and Austin, maybe near Florence. I'll be going to school at UT-Austin (and no, I don't see myself developing into a rabid Longhorns fan anytime soon) and John'll be at Hood, so we were thinking about Florence. Austin is growing by leaps and bounds, and I think that Florence is probably going to end up as a bedroom community for Round Rock, Georgetown and Austin in the next 10 years.

John's willing to try and homestead at Hood, instead of running about the country (with the exception of Drill Sgt. in FLW, Mo.) so...

Yeah, he just kinda whipped that dream out from behind his back and dusted it off and put it up to sparkle in the sun.

I love my husband in ways I can't even begin to describe.

2006-08-20T07:07:00.000-07:00

WTF is up with the new Google/Blogger stuff when you're attempting to log in?

I don't like it, whatever it is!

Foo.

OMG OMG OMG THUD

2006-08-19T07:12:00.000-07:00

Let me repeat that- *OMG OMG OMG THUD*

My husband sometimes jokes that I can read his mind. I can't, of course, but it's fun for us to play with the idea.

There are days, though, when I swear he's been inside my head, rummaging about in the file cabinets and the cupboards that hold my dreams. There are times when I am dreaming about something in my head but haven't mentioned it hime, and we talk, and John just whips the dream out from behind his back, shakes it out, takes a good look at it, and says..."Yeah, we can do that. Here's how....How's that sound to you?"

I'm usually so stunned I fall over, like one of those fainting goats. You know the ones I'm talking about, they fall over stiff-legged when they're suprised.

I've been a fainting goat since last night.

More to come later, but it's good. Really good.

Much to muse on...

2006-08-16T22:31:00.000-07:00

But not much time to post.

John and I had an interesting discussion about my last post. Many things were said that needed to be said. Many things were said that needed to be said, but ooooooh were they uncomfortable.

Thanks baby. I love you.

Le sigh...

2006-08-15T13:19:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm back to working five days a week and school starts next week, too.

Gah. I liked being a bit lazy, but not the fact that I don't make any money sitting on my dead butt. I loathe having to ask for money, and although I know that my darling husband would cheerfully give me the last penny in his piggy bank, it's horribly embarassing to have to hold my hand out. Yeah yeah yeah. I know. My job is to go to school, and the whole tray-slinging gig is a sideline to make my drug money (for fabric, not for illegal pharmacuticals, y'all), but it's still a wee bit humiliating to realize that I'm dependent on someone's else generosity, pretty much.

That's not fair to John, actually. He believes that it is his duty as my husband to take care of me, and he'd cheerfully nuke a small planet but he gets upset if I stub my toe, and I know that he does not resent taking care of me in any way, shape or form. Ever. Evereverever.

That being said, I feel like a total mooch, and looking at the bills, it's reflected in them, so it's back to work I go. I want to be able to buy my gas and my fabric without worrying and without taking money that he gives me to pay for my silly hobbies.

Yes, it's irrational. Welcome to the fact that sometimes, despite my best efforts, I'm neurotic.

There are days I think about going back to AD just to have a steady, predictable income.

Le sigh. Don't mind me. I'm just being weird.

This is why...

2006-08-13T19:57:00.000-07:00

I worry.

If this doesn't make you sad, then I'm not sure what will.

But hey...as long as the terrorists don't win, then anything and everything is justified, right?

I'm sorry if sounds really snarky, but I do worry. I worry a lot.

One of the things...

2006-08-13T11:40:00.000-07:00

That I love about my relationship with my husband is that we can vehemently disagree on things, but still end up slightly closer to each other than we were when we started the conversation.

I treasure my marriage more and more every day. More and more and more.

I know how hard being married can be, the times when it seems easier to just chuck it than stay and fight, but every day, I am reminded why I will fight for this marriage, no matter what comes.

That, and the idea of John standing at the stove with rugrats frying up donuts. (Don't ask.)

It's been a bit...

2006-08-12T11:03:00.000-07:00

Since I've been over here, but I wanted to jot down a few political thoughts, so since I've gotten burned a bit on LJ, this is where I head for that.

I'm a radical middle-of-the-roader. Let me restate that. I'm a centrist. Let me clarify. I do not think either party has a lock on the truth and I don't think either party is going to be the salvation of FITB. There, do we have that?

Now, that being said, I hear a lot of folx complaining about the fact that the Dems are getting shut out of the political process. That's probably true, but part of it's their own damned fault. Dems are seen, rightly or wrongly, as anti-American, anti-military, anti-white-middle-classers, anti-anyone who's not on the handout bandwagon. Whether such a thing even exists is debatable, but perception shapes reality.

I don't vote a Dem ticket because I'm tired of being sneered at for being...oh...strapped enough to shop at Wal-mart, dumb enough to join the military (I got off active duty after 9/11 and joined the NG knowing I'd end up deployed), deluded enough to belong to a church that's older than most of the civilized world and conservative enough to make a Baptist blink. I'm tired of being told that I'm not part of FITB minority, and that I don't matter.

I don't vote a Republican ticket because I don't like the fear-mongering. I don't like my government trying to pass off gross violations of civil liberties as "necessary." I don't like being told that anyone down on their luck is just lazy or stupid, or whatever. I don't like being told that one of our Constitutional duties, to examine what our government does in our name, is siding with the terrorists, and that if I don't agree with everything the government does I'm un-American.

Please note that both these generalizations are gross stereotypes and not indicative of the true feelings of most of the Dems or Republicans in the real world.

Yes, helping other people out is a good goal, especially if they're in a position where they can't help themselves, and I'm all for a hand up. I'm all for making sure that schools in bad neighborhoods get the money they need and that parents who have at-risk kids get assistance. I think a lot of it should come from churches, and from private charities, though.

I think that people should be encouraged to assimilate into American culture, including discouraging ethnic enclaves that allow people to stay insulated and comfortable in a Little Havana or a Koreatown or wherever. And yes, that means that I think upper-middle class neighborhoods need a bit of a kick in the butt, too. There's more out there than your Mercedes-drivin' tennis-club buddies, Buffy, and they might have something to teach you.

Where in the world was I going here? Um. Right...AH!

One of the things that I disagree with my darling husband on is the amount of civil liberty I am willing to give up in order to be safe. I'm not willing to give up too much more than we've already given up, and in fact, I'd like to see some of the stupidity that started after 9/11 rolled back. I am not, in any way, shape or form, a fan of the Patriot Act. I'm not a fan of the TSA and I'm not a fan of the warrantless wiretapping. I don't care if I don't have anything to hide! I don't, btw. I'm just not thrilled with idea of being nibbled to death by ducks.

So, a night or so ago, we started talking about the internment camps for Japanese during WWII. I tend towards hyperbole when I get my dander up, and the internment of American citizens tends to get my dander up. So, publically, I'll apologize to John for inflating the numbers from around 120,000 to "millions." Um. Right. That was Not Cool. Sorry about that, honey.

Anyway, here are some of the "facts" from Wikipedia. (God, what did we do before the Wiki?)

Japanese American Internment refers to the forcible relocation of approximately 120,000 Japanese and Japanese Americans, 62 percent of whom were United States citizens, from the West Coast during World War II to hastily constructed housing facilities called "War Relocation Camps" in remote portions of the nation's interior. The American camps were only meant to isolate the Japanese, in contrast to the Nazi concentration camps which existed to eliminate their captives.

So, out of the 120,000 people relocated, over half of them were American citizens. Repeat after me. WTF?

Okay, so maybe there was a good reason. After all, that 40% might have had spies and sabateurs loyal to Japan, right? Er. Maybe not.

Critics of the exclusion argue that the military justification was unfounded, citing the absence of any subsequent convictions of Japanese Americans for espionage, as well as the fact that the Army resorted to falsifying evidence in order to bolster its case before the Supreme Court in Korematsu v. United States. In response, pro-internment author Michelle Malkin has argued that the absence of any esponiage convictions is immaterial because the government may have possessed unspecified secret evidence of espionage that it was not able to introduce in court; however, her argument has not met with much success among professional historians.^{[citation needed]}

Lieutenant Commander Kenneth Ringle, a naval intelligence officer tasked with evaluating the loyalty of the Japanese American population, estimated in a 1941 report to his superiors that "more than 90% of the Nisei [second generation] and 75% of the original immigrants were completely loyal to the United States." A 1941 report prepared on President Roosevelt's orders by Curtis B. Munson, special representative of the State Department, concluded that most Japanese nationals and "90 to 98 percent" of Japanese American citizens were loyal. He wrote: "There is no Japanese 'problem' on the Coast ... There is far more danger from Communists and people of the Bridges type on the Coast than there is from Japanese."

All in all, I'd have to say the interment was damaging to the United States.

I mean, even J. Edgar Hoover didn't think it was a great idea.

FBI director J. Edgar Hoover opposed the internment of Japanese Americans. Refuting General DeWitt's reports of disloyalty on the part of Japanese Americans, Hoover sent a memo to Attorney General Francis Biddle in which he wrote about Japanese-American disloyalty, "Every complaint in this regard has been investigated, but in no case has any information been obtained which would substantiate the allegation."

So, I'm not feeling it, and I think that it's a pretty clear case of abridgement of civil liberties and fundamental rights guaranteed to citizen amounting to...um...not so much.

Some present-day supporters of the internment have argued that some Japanese Americans were indeed disloyal, as seen by the approximately 20,000 Japanese Americans in Japan at the start of the war who joined the Japanese war effort, hundreds joining the Japanese Army. Additionally, two Japanese Americans on Niihau freed a captured Japanese pilot and assisted him in his machine-gun attack on Native Hawaiians there.[3]

Critics of this viewpoint note that it seems unlikely that Japanese Americans in Japan had any choice other than to be conscripted into the Japanese army, given (1) that it was near-impossible for them to return to the U.S. from Japan, and (2) that the United States had already classified all people of Japanese ancestry as "enemy aliens."

Some present-day supporters of the internment also cite the disloyalty of Tomoya Kawakita, an American citizen who worked as an interpreter and a POW guard for the Japanese army, and who actively participated in the torture (and at least one death) of American soldiers, including survivors of the Bataan Death March. Kawakita was imprisoned in Alcatraz Island for his treason.

Despite all this, it must be noted that the FBI had no documented proof of espionage or sabotage by any Japanese American or Japanese national in the United States, except for a small group of ineffective Japanese nationals who were arrested long before Pearl Harbor and were deported (the Tachibana ring).

I'd have to agree with the idea of the 20,000 Japanese Americans in Japan not being able to come home, and even if they could...why on God's green earth would they? They'd be stripped of their rights!

So, let's say, for the sake of argument, that there were 1200 sabateurs found. I'm still not thinking that a 1% return on the internment justifies it. I just don't.

And like I said, I think it damaged a whole lot more than the Japanese-Americans who were stuck in the camps. I think it damaged a whole lot more.

Some Japanese Americans did question their loyalty to the United States after the government removed them and their families from their homes and held them in internment camps, although such cases were isolated incidents and did not reflect the larger sentiment of the Japanese-American people, who remained loyal to the United States. Several pro-Japan groups formed inside the camps, and riots occurred for various reasons in many camps, most notably Tule Lake, which caused the WRA to move "troublemaker" internees to Tule Lake (see below). When the government asked whether internees wished to renounce their U.S. citizenship, 5,589 of them did so. Of those who renounced their citizenship, 1,327 were repatriated to Japan, although many of these deportees were not accepted by the Japanese Government.

So, even after being moved into these "relocation" camps, only 5, 589 (or 4.6575%) of the internees denounced their US citizenship, and of those, less than 1500 were accepted by the Japanese goverment. Evidently, Japanese with dual citizenship were asked to denounce their Japanese citizenship, but since they no longer had US citizenship, denouncing Japanese citizenship would have left them with no citizenship at all. That's a catch-22, by my definition. I might be wrong.

Drat. I've wandered off the path again. Right now, I have no clue where I'm heading with this.

Ah. Okay. Here we go.

This is to both parties:

Quit it. Quit pandering to the whackos on the far ends of the spectrum and figure out that most of us are stuck here in the middle. I don't like either of you demoninzing and lying and everything else you're doing. Knock it off.

Thank you.

sigh

2006-08-07T20:38:00.000-07:00

Well, let's see.

My credit score is still limping along, but I guess it's all I can hope for, to be patient and ride out the wait. I thought stuff usually dropped off after two years, but I've got stuff on there from 2003, and some of the information's not been updated since March of that year.

Gah. When, exactly, does all that crap drop off, and why is it that when you screw up, the credit reporting agencies put it on your report lickety-split, but getting them to take stuff off takes an act of God?

Yes, John, I know. You didn't marry me for my credit score, but it does have an effect on you. It affects our ability to get a loan for land or a house or a car or just about anything.

Tuition is due 31 Aug. Need to email Maria and find out when I need to turn in the app for the tuition assistance, if I can get it this semester. If so, that will be easier to live on while I study since the art classes are going to take up a fair chunk of my time.

*sigh*

You know, I adore being a grown-up and being married and all that, but still...

Is being able to leave the refrigerator door open all night to air condition the neighborhood really worth this?

Dum dum dum...dum dee dum dum dum....

2006-08-07T16:52:00.000-07:00

Don't mind me. Just getting ready to actually go sew some more quilt squares.

:-D

Well...that feels weird.

2006-08-04T10:22:00.000-07:00

I just cut the flags and nametapes off my DCU tops, in order to put them in the Goodwill donation box.

It feels weird to be dropping what was such a part of my life for a year and half in a box.

I know. I'm strange.

In other news, just dropped a healthy payment on the credit card so I can put tuition for the semester on it. Yoikes.

I'm sorry.

2006-08-03T09:09:00.000-07:00

I seem to be saying that a lot the past few days.

I'm sorry for snarking at you, baby. I love you.

Nineteen down...

2006-08-01T18:07:00.000-07:00

And 30 more to go before the top is actually finished. Wheee!

I've got the fabric for the backing and the borders picked out, too.

Now, I just need to get a free-motion foot for Big Blue and figure out what I want to do for a quilting design for the top.

My goal...

2006-08-01T13:40:00.000-07:00

Is 20 blocks finished today. Wish me luck!

If I have not...

2006-08-01T12:53:00.000-07:00

mentioned exactly how awesome my husband is in the past hour, I have been remiss. Completely and utterly remiss.

What brings this on, you ask? Oh...the fact that he sends me huge pink bouquets for any reason, or none at all, because it's our anniversary, or because it isn't, quite.

I have never, in my life, been so blessed by someone. And it ain't just the flowers, either. He reminds me to take care of myself, to take my meds, to get enough sleep, and he reminds me, every single day, how much he loves me.

John, I love you.

fnor

2006-08-01T09:24:00.000-07:00

Not much else, just *fnor*.

John and I got cut off mid-mush this morning. This is my sad face. Foo.

I have a quiz in class today and then, I'm coming home, finishing my article, and processing the photos, and sewing! Whee.

Ask...

2006-07-30T14:58:00.000-07:00

And you shall receive...sort of.

I got to work, and not only was I not on the line-up, because Will can't keep track of when I'm in town and when I'm not...but Jessie sent me home, since he had 16 servers on the floor. On a Sunday night. Yeah, not making *any* money there.

So...I think that after Lissa comes to visit, I'm going to try picking up Friday nights or something. Maybe Friday day and Saturday day. That would probably make me about a bill, and that's nothing to sneeze at.

Off to cut fabric.

Meh.

2006-07-30T13:13:00.000-07:00

I'm just kind of meh today. Not sure why, but I'm just kind of...meh. I'm working on cutting fabric for my Ugly Quilt, and I'm really not wanting to go to work, but I need to. I need running around money, and it's a good way to get it.

Would really rather stay home and play with fabric though. Meh. Or stay home and watch B-5, or stay home and nap, but...

Meh.

I say again, meh.

Well...I'm in Longview

2006-07-28T16:55:00.000-07:00

East Texas is pretty, but I'm not so sure I'd want to live here. I've never seen so many people smoking in my life! They're all over the place. In fact, the hotel I'm at only had a smoking room available. It's not too bad, but I can certainly tell it's smoking room. Gah.

Okay, so the drive here was pretty uneventful, if you call getting directions from someone with fewer teeth than fingers, and starting the morning off with an overturned tractor-trailer full of gravel.

Not much to say tonight, really. Just tired and cranky, and wishing that there was a restaurant attached to the hotel so I didn't have to go anywhere for food.

Bleah.

John, I'm sorry. I know that I apologized before, but I'm still upset that I was thoughtless and hurt your feelings. I'll work on getting better about the issue.

WTF? (Profanity)

2006-07-27T14:08:00.000-07:00

What the *fuck* did I do to deserve that? I guess at some point I made the mistake of actually showing that I was human, that I fucking hurt and that I'm tired.

Whoops. I seriously won't be doing that again. I'd been splitting my time between this and LJ, and right now, I'm sitting here in shock.

But today's a tough one. 12 months without him was rough. Another 6-12, well, it's doable. But not a good thing. And please, Jenn, I know you're without your husband even more. So please don't tell me that others have it worse. I know they do. But today's still not easy for me. If that makes me a wimp, so be it.

I didn't deserve that. At least I don't think I did. Shit.

I made that post ad apologized all over the fucking place. What else am I supposed to do?

So, this was my response:

WTF?

When have I ever comme into your LJ and told you that?

I didn't deserve that. If you'll excuse me, I'll try and tell you that it sucks and then, I'll leave.

It sucks that your husband won't be coming home as planned. I'm sorry for it. I hope that you hang in there and that your reunion is a joyful as it possibly can be. May he stay safe and may God watch over you all.

I'm actually really hurt. I guess I just come off as totally uncaring or something. Holy shit.

I don't know if I should be hurt or pissed off right now.

More from The Law Dog: I think we need a dictionary!

2006-07-25T20:18:00.000-07:00

The LawDog Files: Please, sir, someone's hi-jacked my language and I'd like it back.

You've got to be kidding me. You know, if my mother were to act like Cindy Sheehan has if I bought some real estate in Iraq, I'd come back and haunt her. Rattling chains and all.

Interesing...

2006-07-25T09:00:00.000-07:00

Why is it that I will cheerfully pray for other people, but I find it so hard to pray for myself?

Road Trip!

2006-07-25T08:51:00.000-07:00

Actually, because I missed drill last month due to John's leave, I'll be taking a short trip to Tyler, Texas to cover a brigade stand-up or something like that. :-)

Looks like I'll be gone 28-29 July, and will be on IDT orders. Yay me.

Granted, it's a long drive from here, but not a biggie.

OH! Over 100 posts here. God, I need a life.

The LawDog Files: Ah feel, Ah say, Ah feel faint.

2006-07-25T08:37:00.000-07:00

The LawDog Files: Ah feel, Ah say, Ah feel faint.

Well, I managed to throw this up on a friend's blog, so I'll put it up on mine, too.

:D

I think...therefore I dork.

2006-07-24T21:08:00.000-07:00

I'll be turning in early tonight.

I got a phone call from my darling husband, and it was wonderful. We chatted about my character, and he's beginning to like the concept for her. We hammered out some details and some of them just got filled in by chatting with him. That is SO cool. He'll listen to me natter on about gaming, and then bounce some stuff back at me. Yay for gamer geek marriages!

So...here's the updated Elizaveta bio:

Born to a minor boyar family, Liza had a pretty idyllic childhood.

Her parents loved each other, and she worshipped the ground her older brother Pyotr walked on. She learned to write by pestering the priest at the local church, and by her 13th summer, she was transcribing books for the fathers. By shamelessly trading on her blonde cuteness, Elizaveta managed to not only learn to ride well, she learned to handle a sword with her brother and take care of the family estate. Very little has ever scared her, and as she's grown up, it's only gotten worse. Through the years, she's struggled to learn the "womanly arts," and her mother has pretty much despaired of ever turning Liza into a proper lady. Sometimes, Elizaveta will catch her mother staring at her, but she can't ever figure out what so concerns her Mama.

During the late fall of her 13th year, Elizaveta's mother died of a terrible coughing sickness. The next spring, Elizaveta's father concluded marriage talks, and they began to prepare for Elizaveta to go to her betrothed's household in the spring after that.

Much to Elizaveta's surprise, when she reached her new home, she found her betrothed to be all that her papa had promised and more. Ivan Ivanovich was a tall, handsome man with a quick mind and a exerburant personality. To both their surprise, they fell deeply in love. Despite their happiness, all was not well.

Ivan's younger brother, Rodian, was not so pleased with the way things had been working out, and not realizing that Elizaveta and Ivan had fallen in love, approached her with a plan to remove Ivan from the picture. Elizaveta rebuffed Rodian, but couldn't figure out how to tell Vanya that his adored baby brother was plotting to kill him. Being unable to speak when most needed had cost Liza many things in this life, but it would prove even more dear.

One afternoon, during a winter hunt, men set upon Ivan and Elizaveta. While holding Elizaveta to prevent her from helping her husband, the thugs knocked Ivan to the ground and forced him to drink poisoned wine. Leaving him on the ground to die, they told Elizaveta that her plot to kill her husband and take over the estates had been uncovered, and that her diary had been found. Aghast, Elizaveta lunged for Ivan's sword, only to be knocked to the ground. The thugs proceeded to beat her, then left her a horse, after telling her that the money and jewels she'd stolen were in the saddlebags, and they would be enough to get her to the coast.

Heart-broken, Elizaveta asked Matushka to take care of her beloved's body. Knowing that she would be killed immediately if she returned to the estate, she fled, confirming her "guilt."

That's all I've got so far, but it sounds pretty good to me.

This post brought to you by the letters D, O, R and K and the number 20.

Back to work...

2006-07-23T20:31:00.000-07:00

For my drug money. Got a bunch of miniature quilt blocks at the show, but I'm going to have to enlarge them a bit just to work with them. I don't have that kind of patience. Nope, just don't.

Also got stuff for Christmas presents, and I'll be starting those soon. I've got ideas for two of them the, but the others...whoo. I have no clue what I'm getting my darling husband. And yes, I know what Mom and Dad A want, but they can't have it. If they're not careful, they'll end up with another Cabbage Patch doll. :-)

Not much else going on. I'm thinking about pulling my material out of the dryer and getting it set up to work on tomorrow. If I'm not careful, I'm going to end up with nothing but the underpinnings done, and I'll be in the Naked Iron Dress Competition.

I've been really down the past few days. My meds aren't working the way they used to, and I'm having more and more and more trouble getting out of bed. I missed church this morning because I slept through my alarm. I haven't done that in ages.

I just have no energy in the mornings. Once I get up and get going, I can slog on through the day, but...ugh. Getting up is kicking my butt. Seriously. I have an appointment with my GP on Wednesday, so we'll have to see what she says. I don't want to add another med to my routine, since I have a hard enough time remembering to take my meds as it is.

Gah. I don't wanna play no more.

And there was gaming...

2006-07-22T23:40:00.000-07:00

Sort of. I managed to not get my character done, but I did sit in on the group and they're fun. I've decided on a basic concept, but I'm not sure how we'll flesh her out. (Yes, I'm playing a female character. I never play male characters. I'm not wired for it.)

So, here's the idea. I'm playing a Ussaran ship-owner, who is cursed and has a hunted past. I also took a hubris for the extra points. I had four to chose from, so I did the ultimate gamer decision making and rolled the D4. I ended up with reckless. Not sure how I'm going to work all this in, but there's a chance I could end up as a part of a secret society.

So far, I'm thinking of having her go to sea after her husband is killed in a "freak" hunting accident. After killing her husband's younger brother, who was next in line for the family fortune (sorry Jason!), she's now hunted for murder. Evidently, the cursed part comes in from my childhood, at least according to the book, so I'll have to figure that out, but after killing her brother-in-law, she ran to the sea to hide away and to get away from the men pursuing her.

Luckily, fortune favored her and she's managed to work hard enough to get her own ship, but she's gotten the feeling through her life that Matushka's not thrilled with her family and so...perhaps she's going to head out to Montaigne.

I get an extra five points for a well-written character history, so I think that I shall do it in the form of...can you guess? A journal. I know. It's shocking.

BTW, if you don't game, this entire entry can be summed up with "dork dork dork."

See...this is why I left paganism.

2006-07-20T21:57:00.000-07:00

If I believed in a heaven, I don't think I could believe it's only for some.

This is a comment in response to someone else's hope that anyone killed in the Israel/Lebanon conflict, including terrorists is escorted straight to "paradise" by flights of angels.

See, this is where the touchy-feely nature of paganism/neo-hippie-liberalism/diversity theory/everyone-is-good-and-no-one-is-ever-bad-and-we-should-all-just-get-along crowd loses me. No, everyone is not good, and no, heaven isn't just some speakeasy gin joint where you go when you've got nothing else to do.

If you break the rules, or you refuse to acknowledge the things that God requires from adherents to Chrisitianity, then...um...right. You and I probably aren't going to be hanging out at the same shows in the afterlife. I mean, I'm NOT saying that you're going straight to Hell, do not pass "Go," do no collect $200, but I am saying that you and I probably won't have the same IP address, okay?

I mean, seriously, why is it that anyone should be allowed to get into the Christian Heaven? I'm not asking to bebop on over to the Sumerlands, or take the three-day-tour of Tir nan Og, or to go hang out at the Hindu after-hours party. But for some reason, Heaven's just supposed to be open to all comers, regardless of whether or not they're actually Christian.

How does that work again? Heaven's not a charity event, tickets to be purchased at the door if you forgot to get them at the office.

Seriously.

I used to think, when I was neo-pagan, that if I were wrong about the whole paganism thang, and I died and ended up in front of God, He'd look at me, tell me I wasn't a bad kid, pat me on the head and let me on in, but I was wrong. I might not be a bad person, but that's not the litmus test of whether or not you get into heaven. It's not whether or not you kicked puppies or stole candy from babies. I mean, God's not thrilled when you do that kind of stuff, but you could probably do all that and still make it in (although I swear you'd better be sitting in the nosebleed section at the Garth Brooks concert in the afterlife) but there's one important thing you have to do.

You have to profess a belief in Jesus Christ as the Son of the Living God, and all that other nifty stuff in the Nicene Creed. You know the one I'm talking about. If you need, I can hum a few bars.

Seriously, it goes something like this:

I believe in one God, Father Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth and of all things visible and invisible.

And in one Lord Jesus Christ, the only-begotten Son of God, begotten of the Father before all ages.

Light of Light, true God of true God, begotten not created, of one essence with the Father through Whom all things were made.

Who for us men and for our salvation came down from heaven and was incarnate of the Holy Spirit and the Virgin Mary and became man.

He was crucified for us under Pontius Pilate. He suffered and was buried.

And He rose on the third day, according to the Scriptures.

He ascended into heaven and is seated at the right hand of the Father.

And He will come again with glory to judge the living and dead. His kingdom shall have no end.

And in the Holy Spirit, the Lord, the Creator of life, Who proceeds from the Father, Who together with the Father and the Son is worshipped and glorified, Who spoke through the prophets.

In one, holy, catholic, and apostolic Church.

I confess one baptism for the forgiveness of sins.

I look for the resurrection of the dead and the life of the age to come. Amen.

That's part of the whole deal. You gotta hang with us on this whole belife in Christ thing. If not, you're not a Christian, and you don't get to sneak past the velvet rope to get in to hang with who we think are the cool kids. Your party is next door. BTW, that's some pretty kickin' music. Can we borrow your DJ?

I guess it's not inclusive enough to make some people happy, but hey...them's the breaks.

(The exact quote is: I pray that the children, and civilians, and soldiers, and even terrorists that die in this conflict are taken straight to paradise and welcomed by flights of angels.

My comment to the OP was that this was where we parted ways.)

Go me!

2006-07-20T11:42:00.000-07:00

I figured out how to change the width for the text on my blog. I am teh shiznit, lemme tell ya.

I'm also in the middle of another argument on LJ. Have a I mentioned that I'm incapable of passing by a post and not opening my big yap? I'm also incredibly grateful for this blog so that I can natter in peace, mostly. :-) I like being me, and sometimes, having to fake being someone else, someone who is unfailingly polite and conciliatory gets old.

Ah well. Such is life.

Now, if I can just figure out how to tweak out the blog a bit further. :-)

Have a killer headache...

2006-07-20T09:01:00.000-07:00

And I don't know why.

Owie.

Phone calls and distance...

2006-07-20T07:46:00.000-07:00

Oh, and driving! If I haven't mentioned it, or if John hasn't, I'm a terribly impatient driver. Terribly. Horribly. Awfully. I tend to get really wound up while driving and I've been known to yell and berate people at the top of my lungs if they do something I consider to be stupid or inconsiderate.

Granted, they may think they were perfectly justified in making that lane change, but they didn't check with me first, and do I have news for them! I mean, seriously. Why exactly didn't they read my mind and figure out that I wasn't in the mood to slow down for their silly butt? However, I do think it's dangerous, as well as stupid, for someone to move into a lane doing 10-15 mph slower than the other traffic in that lane and then...not get out of the freakin' lane! Hello?

Anyway, I got stuck in traffic this morning. Bad traffic and it caused me to miss my crazy-person appointment. I called to let them know that I'd be late, and she said that if I didn't make it in my 0915, to not bother. I looked at the speed of traffic, the next exit sign, and asked to reschedule the appointment. The ever-helpful Bernadette (I've dealt with her before) informed me that she'd let Dr. Wolf know, and danged near hung up in my ear. I managed to get her attention long enough to ask to reschedule the appointment, and she told me that Dr. Wolf would call me to reschedule. That worked so well last time, that it's been over 60 days since my last appointment. So...looks like I'll call back next week and get another appointment.

Foo.

I know that I had a point in here somewhere. I really really did. Somewhere. I'll find it shortly, I'm sure.

Then, I won't be on the computer, and I'll just forget it again.

I hate being blonde.

OH! Phone calls. I've gotten to talk to John three times in the past 12 hours and it's been wonderful. I'm actually feeling pretty upbeat and optimistic and the next six months aren't looking like the death sentence they were. Oh, it still sucks and it's still way longer than I want to spend away from my darling husband, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel and I'm relatively sure it's not a train. Relatively. Mostly.

So...one of the girls in my unit is trying to get me to go to OCS with her. Gah. How scary is that? Me, an occifer. John's all about it, but I would have to start running now. I need to anyway, but gah. Let me repeat. Gah.

The plan for the Iron Dress proceed apace and I think that I'm going to take apart another dress for the forepart. It's a maroon wool, and the cloth that I'm thinking of using would look great with a maroon wool forepart, or even a maroon wool bodice...Hmmm.

Great. Now I've got more ideas. Someone stop me. Please?

W00tness!

2006-07-19T08:31:00.000-07:00

And there is much w00tness! More to follow later.

Suffice to say, it's a good thing. Sadly, it's not about John, but it's still good. Good thoughts and prayers appreciated.

Well...what to say?

2006-07-18T21:54:00.000-07:00

God, what a wonderful two weeks. How fast they flew by, but oh! How wonderful they were!

I don't even know what to say, except that I miss having him here already. It might have something to do with having to make my own coffee this morning, but it's more than that.

It's not waking up with a warm body curled up behind me, or rather, not waking up when that warm body gets out of bed to ~~stagger~~ bounce to the coffee-maker and then return holding a coffee cup triumphant.

It's not snuffling into that mug while sitting at the breakfast bar and watching him fix pancakes or eggs (which he hates) or whatever while I blink blearily at him and he natters on like I'm actually awake.

It's not having the need for another pillow on the bed, and not having to bump him back with my butt as he creeps across the centerline of the bed to snuggle. It's also not clinging to the side of the mattress like a particularly robust mountain goat because he's a bedhog, but I'll take that any day over not having him here.

It's not giggling maniacally at him at 0114 while wrestling on the living room floor, and not hearing him giggle back while wheezing about how we have to talk about the fact that I'm an insane night person.

It's not rolling my eyes at the towels tossed casually over the top of the bathroom doors to dry, or the hand-towel stuffed on a bar. It's not being able to wander into the kitchen and ask him if he wants to take a shower with me, even if there's no nookie involved.

It's not being able to rub my face against his right after he's shaved and smelling his shaving cream. It's not laughing when he tells me (again) that he really likes the smell of my hairspray, and not laughing when he gives me that "WTF?" look when I bury my nose at the base of his throat and tell him how much I love the way he smells after a long day.

It's a lot of "nots" right now, but looking back on the past two weeks, there have been so many "haves" that I can hardly believe he's mine, and that he's actually still in love with me. The past two weeks...how to describe them, except as a gift from God?

We did get to spend time with the 'rents, and that was wonderful. I think that we managed to squick his brother with the gooeyness that is us, but that was fun, too. Jason was very patient when we were role-playing and didn't throw a single miniature at us, too. :-D Very cool.

One downside, and it was a pretty big one, was that Ryan, John's cousin, ended up in the hospital. He and John's family went to Austin with us for liturgy, but Ryan ended up not feeling well, and vomiting, so...we ended up at the ER with him. I'm a bit more of a worry-wart than I like to let on, but God, I was so scared.

He's an insulin-dependent diabetic, and he ended up in DK. It appears that he had a lovely viral stomach bug (which he kindly shared with both John and me) and when he got to throwing up, he couldn't stop it, and that just sent his blood-sugar out of control. Evidently, there was some concern about him not taking care of himself while he was here, but the blood-work showed some viral ickiness, and then John and I both got sick and...so...he got out of the hospital yesterday evening and I put him on a plane this afternoon. I would cheerfully have kept him, but he's got a life in Virginia and needed to get back to it. Foo, I say.

Well, that's about it for me. I need to see if I can find my flippin' corset so that I dont' have to make another for the Iron Dress competition, and get to work on that. Gah.

BTW, in case anyone is wondering...

I'm handling this much, much much much much better than I did last time. I've got support in place and a routine to get back to, so I'm not sunk in nearly as deep a depression as I was worried I would be. I have an appointment with the shrink on Thursday, and the GP on the 27th, so I'm also trying to get better about taking care of myself. I've promised John that I would eat better than I had been and I will.

Anyway, I should go curl up and get the vestiges of this headache to go away. John, I love you and miss you greatly.

Just A Camp Follower...

Almost time...

LIfe is good...

I don't do sick well...

It's been a while!

I want to be happy...

Note to self:

Thank you, everyone,

I don't believe this...

So, it's probably not that big a deal to you....

Just to let you know...

Cracked heels...

I just spent....

Halloween wasn't good...

I am so tired and melancholy today...

Argh!

Life's been pretty boring lately...

ARGH!

This is not a good feeling...

Remind me...(PROFANITY AND WHINING)

Songs that make me cry...

I hate this with a passion...

Shaking...

Tired and cranky...

Ouch.

Gah....

It's not that I want him to NOT tell me...

Been a while...

And for a quick bit of linkage before bed...

Tired and a little sad tonight...

Going to a hot place in a woven container...

I worry....

A few thoughts before bed...

BTW...

An idea of scale

Further left.

On the left.

Facing the narthex

Stunning.

Behind the altar.

In the altar

On the back wall, up high

Installing the new icons

Busy busy busy....

QOTD:

Cold hard reality...

Highlights from our conversation last night...

Glory to God!

*snerk*

Note to self:

The LawDog Files: Ask, and ye shall receive:

Isn't that special?

*giggle giggle giggle*

Wheeeee!

One of the things I find amusing...

Gates of Vienna: Death Cult Kids

I found a bunch of stuff while wandering teh intrawebs....

Gates of Vienna: Die Dummen Schweden

Day three of the new workout.

Annie Get Your Gun!

Hey mister, can you spare a dime?

Note to self:

Note to self:

Hrm...

*sigh*

Okay okay okay...

*OMG OMG OMG THUD*

Much to muse on...

Le sigh...

This is why...

One of the things...

It's been a bit...

*sigh*

Dum dum dum...dum dee dum dum dum....

Well...that feels weird.

I'm sorry.

Nineteen down...

My goal...

If I have not...

*fnor*

snerk

giggle giggle giggle

sigh

OMG OMG OMG THUD

sigh

fnor